I’m stuck in a rut and don’t know what to do about it. I’ve tried a lot of different stuff to get out of it but the problem is I think it’s just me. I’m stuck doing the same things over and over and over again, to the point that my mind just goes numb. It’s like I’m beating my head against a wall expecting that one day I’ll break through and make it to the other side. And I’m hoping that on the other side of said wall will be some glorious garden where everything will be perfect and I’ll have very little problems or worries. The problem is that I know that on the other side of this wall is just another wasteland, one full of regret and disappointments that will only beat me down further. But at least I will be making progress right? At least I’m in front of a new wall facing new challenges and working hard to make it through these new trials.
I was told by my Bishop the other day that I shouldn’t worry about work or school or money or girls or anything like that. He quoted the hymn “Lead Kindly Light”. In the last 2 stanzas of the song it says “Keep thou my feet; I do not ask to see the distant scene; one step enough for me.” He then quoted a scripture from 3rd Nephi 13: 31-34 “31 Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? 32For your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. 33But seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you. 34Take therefore no thought for the morrow, for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. sufficient is the day unto the evil thereof.” I’ve been trying really hard to live by these words but it’s hard to not think of what am I gonna do or where is the next meal coming from.
I don’t know how those people do it. I look up to them immensely. Maybe one day I’ll have the faith to follow in their footsteps and follow this the way it was meant to be followed for now all I can do is try.
